This is a great poem written by a man living in a nursing home in Platte, Nebraska. A friend forwarded it to me, and it I thought it was such a great example of how often we overlook the great wealth of experience and history that our residents come into our homes with.
This is also a great resource for staff training, and a great example of a man’s perception of ageism. I would ask everyone that works in a nursing home to take 5 minutes out of their day to read this man’s poem. Apparently, he hid the poem among his personal belongings in his room, and it wasn’t until after his death that nurses found it while cleaning out the room.
Crabby Old Man
What do you see nurses?. . . . What do you see?
What are you thinking . . . . . when you’re looking at me?
A crabby old man,. . . . . not very wise,
Uncertain of habit . . . . . . with faraway eyes?
It seems that every year between Memorial Day and the 4th of July we are always looking for new patriotic activities for our programs. Usually, we end up with some sort of trivia game or a new way to glue an American flag together. This year, we found a really engaging activity that you can do in a large or small group, or even one-to-one.
The activity is writing a letter to soldier who does not receive very much mail, to let them know how much their sacrifice is appreciated. How do we know which soldiers don’t receive much mail? Well, there is a program called Any Soldier where soldiers who do receive a lot of mail volunteer to help pass mail out to those who don’t hear from back home very much.
There is nothing more engaging for some of our folks that we care for than this idea. Many of our men served in the military in their youth and many of our women had husbands or sons serve as well. And, when you tell your residents or members you are writing to a soldier who does not receive any other mail, you can really create a meaningful, dignified activity for them.
It is really enjoyable to watch when one of your clients self-initiates a game. Today, one of our members brought in a deck of cards and was asking his friends to play Go Fish with him. He is a real charmer, although his form of dementia makes it a struggle for him to determine things that are appropriate. So, in the middle of a group activity, he pulls out his cards and loudly asks his friend to play with him. And, he doesn’t take “no” for an answer, he just deals you a hand of seven cards and waits for you to join!
The other members didn’t really want to sidebar themselves from the group, so I decided to jump in so he would have someone to play with. As we started, I realized I didn’t know what rules he was using for the game, so I asked him to explain it to me. Here’s what he said:
“Well, its a real good game, you’re gonna like it,” his southern drawl was soft but always genuine. “You get seven cards each, and you ask the other player for a card, and if he doesn’t have it you draw from the pile. When you get rid of all your cards you are the winner.” He gave me seven cards and then put the rest in a stack, so you could only draw from the top.
Almost a year ago we started a men’s club at our program because our male enrollment increased quite significantly. I can’t say I have definitive proof, but I do believe having a male on the activity staff (me!) helped attract families looking after their husband and fathers.
Anyways, this meant I had to look into what kind of activities our men’s club would be interested in. At first, I think I was trying too hard. I spent more than a couple hours scouring the internet for a great idea or two, but I ended up pretty much where I started. So I got to thinking, what was it that these guys would do for fun before their dementia set in?
One morning, I decided we were going to try Blackjack. I was a little skeptical at the time, I mean these men had trouble telling time and would reach for words they couldn’t remember. But, I figured if we never tried, we’d never really know, and if they couldn’t really play we’d at least have fun trying.
This is a great poem written by a man living in a nursing home in Platte, Nebraska. A friend forwarded it to me, and it I thought it was such a great example of how often we overlook the great wealth of experience and history that our residents come into our homes with.
